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Tuesday, 12 November 2013


So I am having a little lie down in my bed, with Radio 4 and the teenage iPad, paying Candy Crush, waiting for HWISO to return from the vet with UHU - he's OK but wobbly - when the phone goes.

On the end of the phone is a distinctly Indian Sub-Continental voice, telling me I have a problem with my "Microsoft" account.  So I take him on. I explain that I am dying of cancer and presently lying in my bed, resting and there is nothing wrong with my Microsoft account and that he is the scum of the earth scamming vulnerable people.

He calls me Ma'am and assures me that I am wrong. Unless I let him help me, my emails will be hacked, my bank details stolen and my life will not be worth living.

"Has he not ears?"I think to myself.

I shout louder.  He just continues to insist that I am wrong and he is my Saviour.

I put down the phone.

Jesus, if that was you, you picked the wrong day….

Just saying.

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