For instance, chemo patients are advised to stay out of the sun. I have stayed firmly in the sun much more than is recommended. I have also been told to moisturise like a dervish for my hives. Now I have stopped moisturising AT ALL, my skin is amazing. (That may also be to do with the salt water pool.)
The chemo that was supposed to help made things worse. I have, as part of the Oh Sod It, taken up serious smoking with enthusiasm - and relief and, after 6 months of abstinence, gone back to a glass of Sauv Blanc in the evening - well, more than one glass with the FB around but that was part of the fun of having her.
Imagine my amazed bemusement today when I was told that my new regime of "do everything you're not supposed to because it doesn't matter" seems to not be having the evidence based effect it is supposed to.
I had to go in to have a blood test before chemo so this morning, having picked G up from an overnight camping party in Minsmere at 7.30 am and driven her to a friend's house to get some sleep before Latitude, a round trip of 3 hours, I took myself off to the hospital for my blood test. So confident was I that this was going to be a quick and easy trip, I parked in the "20 minutes only" parking bay.
The lovely phlebs couldn't manage to get the blood out of the usual channels. Every time they got in, the vein collapsed, so I trooped back to the Day Unit, muttering complaints at the lovely Helen when I passed her in reception. I also coughed "fruitily", which led to an avalanche of tests that ended up with chemo being cancelled and antibiotics being prescribed.
The backwards bit of this whole process was that my chest X-Ray (3 weeks after the last one), shows visible signs of improvement, especially round the lymph nodes.
So I didn't get to wear the T-Shirt to chemo today because there was no chemo but I did show everyone a picture of it on my phone and they all made me PROMISE to wear it for the next chemo because they think its brilliant.
Signing off to go and have a fag and google more carcinogenic things I can do to myself that are pleasurable.....