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Thursday 6 June 2013

Impressions of a Chemo Ward 2

So I got to sit next door to the beautiful J again yesterday.  She has an amazing wig and has sort of styled it and wears a scarf round it.  She looked stunning.

She had been to see the reconstructive team at Chelmsford and seemed quite relived that they were not going to use her tattoo on her tummy to reconstruct her!  It would be weird, I agreed.  She seemed much soothed by them and I am glad.  It is just shitty what she is going through.

Her lovely Mum was there and they have taken my advice (Phew) about feeding her up.  Apparently, Mum can be found most days wandering around with sausage rolls or cheesecake on a plate, exhorting her d to eat.  Bless.  An image that gladdens my heart.

I felt so sorry for her Mum.  She reminded me so much of me.  Wanting so much to take away the illness from her daughter - quite happy to take it on herself.  Trying to be too kind and too involved and the painful waves of sorrow positively radiated off her.  I just wanted to hug her and tell her that I knew exactly how she felt.  I couldn't.  Too English and too many tubes!

I did laugh when we got on to Mindfulness Meditation.  Mum said she wanted J to do it with her.  I said that I thought J may find it useful but NOT if she does it with Mum.  Mum said was she trying to be too helpful?  J and I both said Yes.  We all laughed.

M was there too for her blood transfusion and her lovely round husband came in to pick her up.  They gladden my heart with their obvious love for each other and their gentle bickering. 

I slept all afternoon, except for the bits when I woke myself up snoring.  The anti histamine really did its work and I am less uncomfortable today.  The lovely tea lady left me my tea, whilst I was asleep.

I had to nag my nurse (again) to go for her lunch break at 2.30.  She said it didn't matter as she needed to lose a few pounds.  I explained that skipping lunch wasn't the way to lose a few pounds.  She injected the piriton pretty swiftly at that and I nodded off before I could really rant - much to her relief, I suspect, and the relief of the other patients.  I had already gone off on BMI earlier that morning and the oncology department doesn't give out free earplugs.

All that sleeping meant I was wide awake for the FEAST Board Meeting last night (9-11.30 pm - not something I am usually awake for).  I contributed.  Way too much.  Motor mouth me on steroids - probably not the ideal combination for my first Board meeting.  However, I enjoyed it.

Apparently I am on Week 9 and have 3 more to go in this cycle, before I get a week off.  I have sort of committed to going to France in my week off to help darling E drive this back.  She says it needs brakes before we start.  I say it is doubtful that we will be able to get up enough speed to need brakes.  In my week off, I want to live a little dangerously.  

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